FALLOW PASTURES & ALL SOULS DAY by Maureen Clark

Fallow Pasture

in my mother’s fallow pasture

two lame deer 

one missing a leg

the other one injured

are temporarily safe

from cars and cougars

but they are still 

so vulnerable     they nibble 

at the garden stubble

unguarded 

the way I am now 

that both of you 

are dead  my friends

in the same week

I can’t run 

fast enough    to outpace 

the tide of grief

can’t jump   high enough 

to clear the fence

I must hunker down 

and wait  like the 

wounded animal 

I am

All Souls Day

on All Souls Day

we visit your grave

to see the headstone

and mom says

I never think of him being    here

and she’s right

you are only here 

in the carved words

we didn’t wear black

or bring purple flowers

and while we stand

a silence comes

plus two deer and a fox

a few tears

and we are so still

the animals ignore us

and your beautiful life

spreads across the valley

until the deer scatter

the fox darts

we get back in the car

and make small talk

about anything 

but you

Maureen Clark’s book This Insatiable August was released in 2024 by Signature Books. She has received two nominations this year for a Pushcart Prize. Her memoir Falling into Bountiful: Confessions of a Once Upon a Time Mormon won Honorable Mention in the 2024 Utah Original Writing Competition.